Things I Would Rather Do Than Listen to Stephen A. Smith Talk

  • Chew rocks
  • Listen to the Moby Dick book on tape narrated by Lou Holtz
  • Watch Titanic in spanish
  • Take a vacation to Siberia
  • Go to the dentist
  • Play hopscotch in a landmine field
  • Go see Carrot Top’s show
  • Pour a bucket of rattlesnakes down my pants
  • Fight Brock Lesnar
  • Watch women’s ice hockey
  • Kill a puppy
  • Become a vegan
  • Take a cross-country road trip with Al Sharpton
  • Be a contestant on Bromance

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